"What if My Showroom Manager is a Sourpuss?" - 11/27/19 Edition
Stephen Says Column

 Dear Stephen:

 I have sort of an unusual question. I have several moles on my face which have always been something of an issue for me but now, as I’ve grown older, I’m starting to feel like they are becoming more and more prominent. Frankly, I am very self-conscious of them. So much so that I have gone to a dermatologist (first to check them out to be sure they were not cancerous, which they are not) and then a plastic surgeon to see if I can have them removed. It seems removal is possible, but it would not be covered by my insurance, and I am a little apprehensive about it in the first place.
 
 A few years ago, at one of my first jobs in furniture, one of the sales executives had a big port wine stain on his face. Most of the time he would wear makeup over it, so it was a while before I knew it even existed. Once I did see it though, I am embarrassed to say, I found it distracting. This, of course, got me thinking about my own blemishes and how others both in the workplace and in my social world might find it odd or distracting.
 
 Whether meeting with clients or in an interview, I cannot help but feel I am being judged by the moles on my face. I am not even talking about beauty or vanity. It is not that I think I am ugly or unattractive. I simply have a real abnormality on my face I can see and feel. Sometimes it is as simple as my 7-year-old nephew asking “Uncle Mark, what is that thing on your face?” Any suggestions on how to handle this?
 
 Signed,
 Self-Conscious

Dear Self-Conscious:

 If it bothers you, I say fix it, and I will give two options.
 
 Studies do show that a birthmark or visible scar can have a real effect on your performance in a job interview, and not just in-person interviews. The effects are often even more prominent in a Skype interview. After you read my own opinion, take some time to look at the study “To Look or Not to Look: Acknowledging Facial Stigmas in the Interview to Reduce Discrimination” written by Juan Madera and Mikki Hebl at Hilton College in Houston, Texas.
 
 The study examines how facial imperfections and blemishes can play a specific role in the interview process and the conclusion was unexpected. If the interviewee mentions or acknowledges his blemish at the start of the interview, the interviewer (potential employer) is much less likely to be distracted by the blemish, and is more likely to concentrate on the interviewee’s questions and answers instead of looking at his face. The researchers conducted an experiment with 121 people in eight-minute mock job interviews. Here is the LINK to the study: https://scholarworks.bgsu.edu/pad/vol5/iss2/3/.
 
 You could bring up the blemish to reduce the stigma but that doesn’t get at the heart of the issue. I can tell this is really bothering you so here is what I would do:
 
 When I am not at my day job as a headhunter, I am a talking head on TV and a public speaker or orating specifically about matters of the workplace. If I were in your position, I would opt for the plastic surgery. I have interviewed many people who have your issue or something similar. Sometimes I even ask about surgery, or they tell me about plastic surgery they have had done. In my own very unscientific study, I can absolutely report that not a single person I know has regretted the plastic surgery.
 
 I would liken it to a friend of mine who had a hip replacement at 45. He spent years beforehand apprehensive about the surgery because he did not feel it was necessary for someone so young. After he had the hip replaced, he said it was the greatest and most freeing thing he has ever done. It wasn’t just the pain — he later realized the limping made him look and feel older. He truly was a new man. It is a small cosmetic change for you that truly makes a huge difference in the way you interact with the world. Remember that it isn’t just at work — you will feel better at a wedding or a dinner with friends or even meeting with your child’s teacher.
 
 I know it might be a hard pill to swallow but keep in mind I am not suggesting a facelift or Botox. I would simply like to see you get a simple procedure that will make you feel better and more comfortable in your own body. Not covered by insurance? Unless it is outrageously unaffordable, consider it a small investment in yourself, like going to the gym. Plus, consider how many more sales you may end up closing or jobs you may end up getting because of the confidence you will have. If you can sell with moles on your face, imagine how you will could sell without them!
 
 Signed,
 
 Stephen
 

  You can send your workplace questions to Stephen at: StephenSays@bellow.press
 
 Questions selected to be answered, will appear in this column. Please use the Subject: Stephen Says for all emails. Stephen Viscusi is a bestselling author, television personality, and CEO of The Viscusi Group, global executive recruiters located in New York. Follow Stephen on Twitter @stephenviscusi; Like Stephen on Facebook; and follow him on LinkedIn.